Carrot Cake

A set of rhymes I want to share.  I wrote this a couple years ago when I was working as an assistant to the pastry chef at a local upscale restaurant. This came to me after observing my superior become agitated when her carrot cake was taken off a catering menu and replaced with a Sara Lee cake due to cost factoring. This rhyme is meant to be expressed from her perspective. But yeah, its more or less the product of boredom, haha.

My recipes are superior

To your inferior technique

Delicious, round, and moist

Directly mirroring an inner voice

Of culinary genius

Pure delicatessen delight

I've worked this shit for years

Not a hobby, its my life

Of proportions gastronomical

Delicious for your face

I can even beat you at

This farce-ass daytime race

To produce the most food

Within a set amount of time

Making cold hard cash

Whilst spitting cheesy rhymes

So fuck off with your words

And your preconceived conceptions

Watch me act redundant

With intention of ingraining lessons

Your cake is fucking shitty

Dry, stale, and old

You best get back to school

Best do what you are told

While I shell out delicious cakes

Not a hobby its my life

Remember these words I've spoke

Ingrained through trials and strife

By the way, Sara Lee had nothing on her cakes.